Lingam Massage

In many Tantric texts you will find the word "Lingam", the Sanskrit word for penis. Loosely translated "Lingam" means "Wand of Light". Tantra tends to regard the penis as a "Divining Rod" that channels both positive and creative energy along with limitless unyielding pleasure. In the East it is respectfully viewed and honored, not shameful and hidden like in the West.

The Goal

The goal is to massage the Lingam, including sourrounding areas, testicles, perineum and Sacred Spot (like female G-spot). In reciprocity the giver of the lingam massage can experience the joy of facilitating and witnessing the receiver surrendering to his softer, gentler side, a form of pleasure he may not be used to.

Go Easy - Go Slow

The Lingam Massage can create a space in which the receiver can relax and enjoy the expanded pleasure from his Lingam. This massage can be used as a form of safer sex and is an excellent process to build trust and intimacy.

It is often used to help men heal from negative sexual conditioning and trauma. Whilst bypassing social sexual conditioning, Lingam Massage allows men to experience their softer, more receptive side and thereby experience a new level of pleasure from a non-traditional perspective.

In our Western, male dominated society men need to learn to relinquish their control and to fully experience relaxation and a total surrender to pleasure.

Social sexual conditioning has put man in a goal-oriented performance mode. The goal being a quick release of cum instead of the pleasureful journey leading to that eventual "release". Sort of: "Wham Bam Later Sam".

Breathing

Before contacting the body, begin with deep, relaxed breathing, called Pranayama. This breathing technique is very simple, but don't let that fool you. Used in this way here, it will help you experience powerful energies innate to your own being, but hardly ever tapped into. During the following massage occasionally remind the receiver to breathe deeply to sink deeper into relaxation.

Get Comfortable

Have the receiver lie on his back with pillows under his head so he can look up at his partner (giver). Place a pillow, covered with a towel, under his hips. His legs are to be spread apart with the knees slightly bent (pillows or cushions under the knees will also help) and his genitals clearly exposed for the massage. The giver sits cross-legged between the receivers' legs.

Gently massage the legs, abdomen, thighs, chest, nipples, etc., to get the receiver to relax. You may want to pour a small quantity of a high-quality oil on the shaft of the Lingam and testicles.

Let the Pleasure unfold like a Lotus Flower

Begin gently massaging the testicles, taking care to not cause pain in this sensitive area. Massage the scrotum gently, causing it to relax. Massage the area above the Lingam, on the pubic bone. Massage the Perineum, the area between the testicles and anus. Take your time. You are giving a massage to an often neglected area of the body.

Get the Healing Juices flowing

Massage the head of the Lingam as if you are using an orange juicer. Massage all around the head and shaft. In Tantra there are many nerve endings on the Lingam that correspond to other parts of the body. It is said many ailments can be cured by receiving a good Lingam Massage.

Soft and Hard

The Lingam may or may not go soft as you perform this technique. Do not worry if it doesn't get hard again. You will probably find that it will get hard, then go soft, get hard again, etc., which is a highly desirable Tantric experience, like riding a wave, bobbing up and down. Hardness and Softness are two ends of the pleasure spectrum.

Left Hand, Right Hand

Massage the shaft of the Lingam. Vary the speed and pressure. Gently squeeze the Lingam at the base with your right hand, pull UP and slide off and then alternate with your left hand. Take your time doing this, left, right, left, right, left, etc. Then, change the direction by starting the squeeze at the head of the Lingam and then sliding DOWN and off. Again, alternate with right and left hands.

Peaking, going from Peak to Peak

If it appears that the receiver is going to ejaculate, back off, allowing the Lingam to soften a little before resuming the massage. Do this several times, coming close to ejaculation, and then backing off. Remember, the goal is not orgasm in and of itself. Men can learn the art of ejaculatory mastery and control by coming close to ejaculation and then backing off on the stimulation. Deep breathing is key here and will soften the urge to ejaculate.

Eventually ejaculatory mastery will allow you to make love as long as you want and you can become multi-orgasmic without losing a drop of semen. Orgasm and ejaculation are two different responses that you can learn to separate. The result is a very expanded sex life.

The Sacred Spot

Find and massage the male Sacred Spot. There are two ways to do this.

One is by finding the spot midway between the testicles and anus. There is a small indentation about the size of a pea or maybe larger. Be gentle and push inward. He will feel the pressure deep inside and it may be intensely painful at first. As this area is worked on and softened, he will be able to expand his orgasms and master ejaculatory control. You can massage his Lingam with your right hand and massage his Sacred Spot with your left hand. Try pushing in on this spot when he nears ejaculation. It is aptly named the Million Dollar Point in Taoism.

The other way to access the Sacred Spot is through the anus. Many men, especially heterosexual men, are uncomfortable at first as a result of negative sexual conditioning. Be careful here and use lubrication. The key is to go slow and be very gentle. Make sure he is breathing as you slip a finger from your left hand into the anus about an inch or so. Then crook the finger back in a "come here" gesture. You will feel the prostate gland. Vary the pressure and speed of massage. He may want stimulation of the Lingam as you massage the Sacred Spot. Back off on the Lingam as he approaches orgasm and increase the pressure on the Sacred Spot.

Strong Emotions

Sometimes the man may have strong emotions come up during access to the Sacred Spot. He may cry and remember a traumatic event from his past. You, the giver, are in a place of trust and intimacy. Allow him to feel his emotions and be very loving, not trying to console or fix him, just let him feel whatever he needs to. Encourage him to scream, cry, moan, sob, if it feels appropriate. Be the best friend and healer he could have in that moment.

The Final

If he chooses to let go and ejaculate, encourage him to breathe deeply during the orgasm. It will blow his mind, especially if he has come close and held back at least SIX times before ejaculating. Holding back six times charges up the sexual battery with tremendous energy. It is then his choice as to where he wants to send this energy, outward as they ejaculate (the prevailing paradigm) or inward for other uses (men who master ejaculation are able to channel this energy into other areas of their being).

Post Orgasmic Bliss

When he feels complete with the massage gently remove your hands and allow him to lie there quietly. You may want to snuggle up together or you can leave the room and let him drift off into a meditative state. Allow him to fully experience his childlike innocence and magnificent male beauty.